When a couple gets married, we always think that the two of them should share everything and be dependent to each other from now on. We think that because they already vowed to only let death part them, they should only need each other. But that is wrong. Co-dependency is not as good as it sounds. Though it is good for your partner to need you or vice versa, it can actually lead to dysfunctions and other marriage problems.
What is co-dependency? You can see this as a give and take relationship. The couple would say they can not live without each other when the truth is; they just seek attention, validation and satisfaction. This kind of arrangement is wrong. They mistake true love for the sake of their desires and needs. The worst thing is that they only try to maintain the relationship with the sake of doing so.
Many are blinded by their need to be with someone even if they do not really love the person. What I mean is, these people only want to have someone to be with them to satisfy their physical, emotional and spiritual needs. If you are one of those people, then you have a wrong reason for getting married. Though it might be a part of your past that led you to this, a purpose of having someone or being with that person just for the sake to satisfy your needs is shallow. Because of these, co-dependency exists.
A partner may have lost the sense to think of his or her own self and just think about his or her partner’s needs and wants. Depriving one’s self of its own needs can result to a destructive personality and can make that person’s spouse dependent on him or her without actually helping. If you always care about your partner and start to forget yourself, your partner will only depend on you and not help him or her self. This is quite sad as these people cannot change for the better because they know someone is always there to cover them up.
In a co-dependent relationship, one must face the root of the problem and not just hide the symptoms of it. Though denying the reality might seem easier than facing the problem, it can do a lot more damage at a later time. So why let yourself suffer when you can help your partner help his or self and save this marriage?